I've been inspired by the movie Julie and Julia to create my own blog...a sounding board, if you will. I've been so inundated with thoughts and feelings as of late that I needed a less expensive way than seeing a professional therapist to work out these stirrings...lest I spontaneously explode under their weight.
I'm three years into my transplant onto Planet Autism and, although I have a good understanding of the "lay of the land", I am still fighting moving from short term visitor status to full fledged residency.
My son will be five soon and my husband and I both feel like we have been entrenched on this battleground for twice that amount of years. Most everyone says, "Oh, savor these early years...they grow up so fast...it's such a wonderful, precious time." We cannot possibly have the same perspective because we are so frightened about his future and this present time is such a struggle. To be clear, we relish and celebrate those mountaintop moments but are surrounded constantly by the dark valleys on a daily basis.
The times when we are surprisingly smacked on the face by reality are when we observe our son side-by-side with "typically developing" children. It is possible to "forget" his vast limitations when we are safely cocooned in our own home and I am grateful for that. However, "no man is an island" and we are forced to venture out for the necessities and that includes "getting away from it all" for awhile.
I find myself truly tempted to scream out loud at people when they try to relate to me by using the phrase (I think only those who live on this Planet have a "right" to use), "my child had a meltdown the other day and...."
They REALLY don't have a clue about all that word encompasses or entails. I doubt - very highly - that their child banged their head against a hard surface, slapped themselves, bit a piece of furniture or toy with all their might, couldn't be consoled, wouldn't let you touch them, kicked or bit you and experienced this raging to go on for over 20 minutes.
My favorite social conversation as of late (not so much) is the popular (because of the season) question, "what is your child going to be for Halloween?" I bought a costume but I have no idea if he will tolerate wearing it. We have never attempted trick-or-treating because he's obsessed with people's front porches and repetitively ringing doorbells more than interested in collecting candy. I 'm certain that he would be received with misunderstanding by whomever answers their door because he cannot communicate with any distinguishable words ("trick or treat" coming out of his mouth would be a miracle I would be willing to pay a thousand dollars to hear - $2,000 if he really understood what it meant).
Egads...where did the time go? I must answer the call (dinnertime)...
I'm three years into my transplant onto Planet Autism and, although I have a good understanding of the "lay of the land", I am still fighting moving from short term visitor status to full fledged residency.
My son will be five soon and my husband and I both feel like we have been entrenched on this battleground for twice that amount of years. Most everyone says, "Oh, savor these early years...they grow up so fast...it's such a wonderful, precious time." We cannot possibly have the same perspective because we are so frightened about his future and this present time is such a struggle. To be clear, we relish and celebrate those mountaintop moments but are surrounded constantly by the dark valleys on a daily basis.
The times when we are surprisingly smacked on the face by reality are when we observe our son side-by-side with "typically developing" children. It is possible to "forget" his vast limitations when we are safely cocooned in our own home and I am grateful for that. However, "no man is an island" and we are forced to venture out for the necessities and that includes "getting away from it all" for awhile.
I find myself truly tempted to scream out loud at people when they try to relate to me by using the phrase (I think only those who live on this Planet have a "right" to use), "my child had a meltdown the other day and...."
They REALLY don't have a clue about all that word encompasses or entails. I doubt - very highly - that their child banged their head against a hard surface, slapped themselves, bit a piece of furniture or toy with all their might, couldn't be consoled, wouldn't let you touch them, kicked or bit you and experienced this raging to go on for over 20 minutes.
My favorite social conversation as of late (not so much) is the popular (because of the season) question, "what is your child going to be for Halloween?" I bought a costume but I have no idea if he will tolerate wearing it. We have never attempted trick-or-treating because he's obsessed with people's front porches and repetitively ringing doorbells more than interested in collecting candy. I 'm certain that he would be received with misunderstanding by whomever answers their door because he cannot communicate with any distinguishable words ("trick or treat" coming out of his mouth would be a miracle I would be willing to pay a thousand dollars to hear - $2,000 if he really understood what it meant).
Egads...where did the time go? I must answer the call (dinnertime)...
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